therapoiesis

so much forehead slapping

2012-02-15T19:50:00.000-05:00

You're right. This is weird. But it sure "is said to" treat ALL KINDS of things.

The NY Times published an irresponsible Fashion & Style story related to massage and (although they don't say so) charlatans, so here are some quotes that leapt out at me:

"The stones used in the massage were selected because they can be found in New England (though they are not necessarily sourced from there), underscoring an industrywide trend toward using indigenous materials."

What? I think you meant "underscoring an industrywide trend toward exploiting naive customers, using technology for appearance's sake instead of the client's benefit, and overcharging for things that cost very little to provide." Obviously this lady cares not one whit about actually using indigenous materials, but she'll happily sell you the pretty magic stone after your massage "for an extra $10 to $20."

"Techniques that would have been considered flat-out weird a decade ago are being embraced because the benefits of massage are more widely accepted."

No, they're still flat-out weird, NY Times. You're just lending some of the exploitative crazies credence by gushing about them in the newspaper of record.

(Photo credit, as far as I can tell, goes to Kyle Hill at Science-Based Life, who captioned that picture adorably in a post that's so very worth reading, unlike, it seems, the New York Times Fashion & Style section.)

"every day that you survive, your life expectancy goes up something like five or six hours"

2012-02-13T09:32:00.002-05:00

This conversation between Peter Thiel and Francis Fukuyama is full of interesting ideas regarding public works, the space program, longevity, and welfare, among other things.

My main takeaway is that being a massage therapist (like being a yoga instructor, chef, nurse, or professor) insulates me from the turmoil of the global labor market. A sub-main takeaway is that the Golden Gate Bridge was built in three years (really, four, but still). Nice work, old-timers!

today in anatomical art

2012-02-02T08:37:00.004-05:00

I was sent a link to an article about Lisa Nilsson's paper cross-sections, and I'm in awe. The photographer is John Polak. Here's the full gallery. Hat tip to Carl, who just posted a bird sculpture made of human fingernails.

Why everything is the way it is: because

2012-02-01T12:22:00.003-05:00

"Everything is the way it is because it got that way"—-it's a subtle way of emphasizing the importance of process and history in understanding why everything is the way it is. You simply cannot grasp the concepts of science if your approach is to dissect the details in a static snapshot of its current state; your only hope is to understand the underlying mechanisms that generate that state, and how it came to be.

D'Arcy Wentworth Thompson in On Growth and Form and biologist P. Z. Myers in his essay on this very-full-of-ideas page.

My reading list just expanded by two books: that Thompson that Myers is quoting and John Tyler Bonner's On Development.

Musicians are athletes.

2012-01-09T18:42:00.001-05:00

Enjoy this NPR story about a physical therapist who focuses on musicians, or "athletes of the small muscles." I really love that Schumann wrote a complicated piece that didn't need to involve the middle finger of the right hand because his was injured! And apparently harpists often get hernias.

I've also just been pointed toward this newer piece with Juilliard’s director of physical therapy and a discussion of the treatment and prevention of performing arts injuries.

more* brain art

2011-12-13T09:59:00.000-05:00

Here is art made out of brains made out of other things. I especially like the brain sandwich; for the imaginary cafe I'm opening in the imaginary future, I'd like to have some brain-shaped proofing baskets or loaf pans.

*("More," he says? Well, yes. We must never forget The Museum of Scientifically Accurate Fabric Brain Art!)

Google, Chomsky. Chomsky, Google.

2011-12-11T09:51:00.001-05:00

Two quick things:
1) I just set up a Google Alert to let me know what people with my name are doing on the interwebs, and it paid off instantly. Look what I wrote*!

2) After my last post, I got this text from my dad: "Chomsky is from my neighborhood in Philly and we went to the same high school. Never heard of him before today. The end"

* I didn't write that. God, I wish I had written that.

NOAM

2011-12-07T08:33:00.001-05:00

Happy birthday, Avram Noam Chomsky, who turns 83 today!

Chomsky remembers the first article he wrote was at age 10 while a student at Oak Lane Country Day School about the threat of the spread of fascism, following the fall of Barcelona in the Spanish Civil War. From the age of 12 or 13, he identified more fully with anarchist politics.

That is all.

The Disappearing Spoon

2011-12-01T12:26:00.001-05:00

I'm reading The Disappearing Spoon: And Other True Tales of Madness, Love, and the History of the World from the Periodic Table of the Elements and it's marvelous. Full of interesting anecdotes and facts about elements I've never given more than a few seconds' thought.

This passage about the pseudoscience/pathological science of cold fusion rang familiar, as my Shiatsu final approaches at a distinguished "College of Health Sciences:"

David Goodstein, a Cal Tech physicist, summed things up in an excellent essay on cold fusion: “Because the Cold-Fusioners see themselves as a community under siege, there is little internal criticism. Experiments and theories tend to be accepted at face value, for fear of providing even more fuel for external critics, if anyone outside the group was bothering to listen. In these circumstances, crackpots flourish, making matters worse for those who believe that there is serious science going on here.” It’s hard to imagine a better, more concise description of pathological science.

Kean points out that pathological science is not identical to fraud, "since the adherents of a pathological science believe they’re right—if only everyone else could see it."

Lady Gaga demonstrates how not to drape the thigh.

2011-11-22T12:06:00.001-05:00

While it affords good access to the vastus lateralis, IT band, and knee, this draping would restrict my ability to do focused work on Lady Gaga's anterior and medial quadriceps muscles, tensor fasciae latae, or the gluteals. B-

Battlestar Forgettica

2011-11-21T08:43:00.001-05:00

We're almost through a rewatch of Battlestar Galactica, and we've reached the part where music plays an especially important and puzzling role. Via that tendency that things have of happening all at once, here's this article about how amnesiacs sometimes retain musical ability and memory despite, well, amnesia. I especially like Dr. Finke's idea of tying musical cues to activities to help amnesiacs remember important daily tasks. It makes me want a theme song to brush my teeth to.

Battlestar Postscriptica: Amusingly (to me), the piano piece Kara Thrace plays is called "Battlestar Sonatica."

sleepy little owl!

2011-11-19T13:21:00.001-05:00

Look at the little round owl getting sleepy from a head massage!

That is all.

Stretching: Science says, "Meh."

2011-11-16T09:30:00.001-05:00

I like stretching. It makes me feel limber and lets me know if I have muscles in odd states that might cause trouble during exercise. This quote is pretty straightforward on stretching's proven benefits, though:

“There is little evidence that stretching does anything important,” [the author of a comprehensive literature review] says, “but there is also little to be lost from doing it. If you like stretching, then do it. On the other hand, if you don’t like stretching, or are always in a rush to exercise, you won’t be missing out on much if you don’t stretch.”

from this NYTimes Health blog post

QuackWatch, I salute you!

2011-11-10T09:08:00.002-05:00

A million times yes to this article.

BOLD YOUTHFUL PLEDGE: I will never accept money for, or have very nice things to say about, any of the methods listed under the heading of Irrational Methods ("except perhaps for the use of aromatic oils if clients enjoy their odor"). END PLEDGE.

I also wonder, nearly every day, "whether any of the accredited schools are entirely free of unscientific teachings." My gut response: probably not. Also sadness, because my limbic system is connected to my autonomic nervous system, producer of gut responses. Although when the response involves answering rhetorical questions, the language centers of the cerebral cortex are engaged, plus I'm typing, so multiple motor units are firing voluntarily under the control of other pieces of cortex, and anyway I digress.

It's a little troubling that the therapist who gave the quote about massage not healing anything practices some of the irrational methods in a medical center. People are nothing if not full of surprises.

Finally, these are all excellent takeaway points for consumers of massage:

If the therapist tells you what is wrong with you, the therapist is probably wrong and breaking the law to diagnose.
If the therapist tells you to take "such and such" to help your problem, don't do it until you check with a real doctor.
If the therapist tells you to see a dermatologist because they are concerned about a mole on your back or elsewhere, DO IT!
If the therapist asks you about a lump in your breast or elsewhere, it is probably a good idea to see your doctor.
If your therapist is an ethical one, take a deep breath or two, and enjoy the massage.

vitality >>> frailty

2011-11-09T12:08:00.001-05:00

Exercising regularly now could keep you about as strong as an active 25-year-old until you're at least 70. Keep your motor units and become a shockingly healthy senior citizen with me!

geeks+fabric=magic

2011-11-03T09:53:00.000-04:00

I give you The Museum of Scientifically Accurate Fabric Brain Art. Holy wow.

Someone in the comments is embroidering Ramón y Cajal illustrations of neurons, which, beautiful.

This is no time for sentence structure, my friends! This is a time for ART!

Alternative Literature, psoas major

2011-11-01T10:07:00.003-04:00

All hail the smug brilliance of xkcd.

Or don't. Make your own decisions!

In massage news, I now know how to sink deep into your abdomen to work on a really important hip flexor, psoas major. It feels weird/cool, and after I had mine frictioned for a little bit, my lower back felt sort of miraculously looser and freer. That doesn't look like a real word. Freer. But my back felt good!

Reiki is not a real thing. Avoid "energy work."

2011-10-22T12:18:00.001-04:00

I read this article to say "a warm blanket is nice for you" and nothing more.

Reiki is "energy work," which I know a lot of people like and find comfort in, but I will do everything in my power to avoid ever having to take a class about it. That's partly because those words have actual meanings, which don't interest purveyors of energy work.

Massage works. It has proven and sensible physiological benefits. Energy work has trouble defining either part of its name or even saying why you should take an interest in the first place.

Japan, touching, cats

2011-10-19T14:33:00.001-04:00

Oh, Japan.

Here's my prediction: as our social lives migrate online, so our need for touch offline will become more apparent. We have two choices--we can either normalize touching one another in the same way Italian, Brazilian, Thai, and Spanish people have been doing for hundreds of years, or another commercial industry will find itself in our lives.

(This article at Fast Company, h/t David Graver)

Any chance to tie together anti-corporate sentiment, petting cats, and the importance of getting touched often, especially by a trained massage therapist, is a chance I'm going to take!

Oliver Sacks wins Adorable Science Grandfather of Forever

2011-10-15T20:33:00.000-04:00

How I would love to have Oliver Sacks as my neurology professor! Just to hear him say "hexagons" once in a while would be a treat. Here he talks about hallucinations, temporal lobe epilepsy, and a bunch of other things.

Steve Jobs has died. The internet may have mentioned this to you already?

2011-10-06T19:32:00.000-04:00

I think this one is my favorite.
This one is blog-relevant.
This one is insane and despicable. Note the author's name. What a crazy name.

Stay hungry. Stay foolish.

Show me evidence, or stop wasting my time.

2011-10-01T14:57:00.001-04:00

Shiatsu class has me on a feisty, skeptical kick lately. I'm paying a lot of tuition to be told insupportable, unscientific things about imaginary energy flows, so please excuse me while I use that time to stretch my hamstrings and iliotibial band, things people actually have and can affect through their actions. When you're done talking about how coffee is the result of alchemy (which the teacher actually said in real life), I'll clamber around on the floor like everyone else and practice some new stretches, sure.

I've been immersed in this blog, Science-Based Medicine, lately, as it is a soothing balm for my mind. I especially like its use of the word "woo" to describe nonsense treatments like homeopathy (water) and Reiki (imagination).

Yesterday, I got into a mini-debate with someone about Eastern/Western medicine--a false dichotomy this blog would eschew, while using words like "eschew"!--and I wish I had had the mental wherewithal to spout:

But all claims are not equal. Even the best are imperfect, but we can still apply science and evidence to make informed decisions about the probability of risk vs benefit. And there are some claims that are so against science and evidence (like homeopathy) that any stance other than rejection is a violation, in my opinion, of medical ethics and the trust that society places in medical professionals.

Because, yeah.

So, massage school, please continue teaching me things related to being a good healthcare professional, which I think you're doing excellently, and give me a break if I have to feign any interest in the role of the water element and its meridians (bladder and kidney, naturally) in hair loss, tinnitus, and osteoporosis. Or show me the evidence and carry on. Either way, you're expensive, and I'll keep stretching people's hamstrings because it feels good.

In the service of life

2011-09-24T13:24:00.000-04:00

I honestly can't tell on which side of my 'woo-woo airy mysticism' filter this belongs, but I like at least some of its ideas, so I'm going to post it: In the Service of Life.

This semester is much more intense than last semester. I get to learn the human nervous system in 7.5 weeks, and session reports for Tools of Assessment take at least 5 hours to complete.

I have more techniques at my disposal now, including a lower leg thing that's super-fun to do, and some shiatsu moves that are great regardless of my feelings on meridians (which taking neurology simultaneously makes me want to call sensory pathways, anyway).

Happy fall, FINALLY.

Irene, grades

2011-08-27T11:11:00.000-04:00

As a hurricane the size of Europe chugs toward my very large, quite unprepared--judging by the around-the-block lines at Whole Foods and Trader Joe's last night, not to mention the number and proximity of tall, glass-lined apartment buildings--city, let's take a moment to focus on the important things, ladies. This message has been brought to you by our Surgeon General, whose name is now apparently Dr. Regina M. Benjamin.

And my first semester grades arrived yesterday. They were A's. Very dull.

Saturday links

2011-08-13T10:36:00.000-04:00

OK, so here are some things I've enjoyed recently:

Look at this man move. Look at how he can move his body. Consider the awesome potential of your muscles, and weep for your dance skills. I am in awe of his scapulae.

I found that via this NY Times article, which has one of the worst headlines I've ever seen. I actually clicked on it out of morbid curiosity, only to discover within its paragraphs the dazzling brilliance of Melaku Belay.

This morning, I got a kick out of this essay Balzac wrote about coffee, and Rossini's assertion that two weeks is the ideal amount of time in which to write a freaking opera. I can't speak to the accuracy of the translation, so I'll have to say Balzac and/or the translator is/are pretty good at language. Unlike that sentence.

Bonus nerd-out: Balzac's "electricity emitted by coffee when we drink it" is traditional Chinese medicine's "gu xi," or the vital energy transmitted by food and drink. Intro to Eastern is the last final I have to take, in two days. So far I've gotten 96 in Myology, 100 in Palpation, and nods of approval in Swedish I (with paperwork bearing number grades to come later).

The Periodic Table of Irrational Nonsense

2011-07-27T11:42:00.000-04:00

I love this to an absurd degree.

You'll notice that "massage" does not make an appearance, although some bodywork modalities of which I'm highly suspicious do.

First semester is almost over; I am probably going to pass.

2011-07-26T11:30:00.000-04:00

School is rushing headlong toward the end of our first semester. I got a 107 on my Eastern quiz yesterday, and a 103 on the Myology quiz last week. During our first runthrough of the Swedish full-body sequence, my teacher said she could have graded me that day instead of waiting for the final in three weeks. Good times are boring, readers. Sorry!

Science! Fungus! This blog has EVERYTHING.

2011-07-16T11:52:00.001-04:00

Coconut oil is antifungal, and it's an effective antifungal at that! Who knew? Besides a chunk of the scientific community since 2007, I mean.

I found that out via this page, which has more information about coconuts than I expected to encounter when I woke up this morning. I use coconut oil in some of my soaps, and it's a fairly common massage oil, so now I have more benefits of both to tout.

whoops

2011-07-12T18:21:00.000-04:00

I had an important and sobering day today; during Swedish, which is my favorite class, maybe out of every class I've ever taken in my whole life, I exposed my partner's breast. I was overconfident with my draping--I could have sworn that towel was thicker, and I yanked it too jauntily--and in that moment of haste, out she popped. She gasped, I choked a mortified "I am so sorry," and we continued with the lesson, but holy cow did it throw me. It didn't help that the teacher was standing directly over my shoulder.

For the rest of class, I was useless as a therapist. My strokes were stuttery and unsure, I was wondering the whole time whether she was OK and whether she wanted to punch me (I would have wanted to punch me) and when my hour of working on her was up it was such a relief to climb on the table and zone out and not have breasts.

One surprising consequence of my mistake was that the power dynamic immediately shifted violently to her side, although probably that was only my perception of the power dynamic, because I was fully clothed. When I failed to respect her vulnerability, though, I forfeited any therapeutic good I could have done, leaving her with all the cards in our brief relationship.

I apologized again once she was dressed, and she was cool about it, but I continue to feel like a clod. Let's see how cathartic it'll be to blog about this.

My draping is going to be flawless from now on, as an upside.

The other things I've read today are about Indian call centers and pork processing. This is the least gruesome.

2011-07-07T18:14:00.000-04:00

Heather, an adjunct college professor in Illinois, is the source of the large block quote below. It's hard to read (as a generally idealistic, optimistic person), but it's accurately reflective of my experience in the corporate world:

After being raised in a family with a strong work ethic and being drilled from an early age to study hard, work hard, invest money, etc., I will teach my children the opposite. Do what you want—and don't spend one minute "paying your dues" or "proving" yourself to an employer. This is a scam. You are either paid fairly—by your own standards, not theirs—from day one or you never will be. The moment you stop enjoying your job, quit—because they certainly won't hesitate to fire you on a whim. There is no such thing as "loyalty." Don't waste your youth "building your resume." Go have fun and let life develop as it may. Working for a living simply does not pay—and to exert any effort whatsoever above and beyond what you are being compensated for is to be complicit in your own exploitation.

It's from this recent Mother Jones article about overworked Americans. To quote Ragtime to myself like a big geek, "They're your future clients."

Lifehacker is doing my job for me, but not excellently.

2011-07-06T12:03:00.000-04:00

Lifehacker's running a story about a study that says massage is good for you. Duh.

At the end, though, the post veers off into offering help finding a "cheap" massage, although that article has only one tip, and it's "use the students at your local massage school." I think this is a mistake.

While I'm a student and actively seeking bodies to work on for practice, I'd agree that massage students are a good way to get a generally relaxing session for little or (in New York, at least, while I care to avoid a felony charge) no money. We're able to do a surprising amount for your stressed-out body after not many weeks of training. BUT, if you're seeking relief from a particular ailment--back problem, neck spasm, chronic leg cramp, etc.--PLEASE seek treatment from a fully-trained and properly licensed massage therapist. You do not want a student who doesn't even really know how a cramp works to be experimenting on you while you're in acute pain. Again, duh.

Lifehacker leaves out a crucial piece of the lower-back-pain study: sure, massage is effective against pain and generally pretty great, but the best thing to prevent or treat chronic lower back pain is exercise. Sitting too much is awful for you, an idea that I'm happy to see is gaining a lot of traction among the nerd population recently, so massage (and pills, for that matter) can't fix your back problem if you insist on sitting all the time. Are you sitting now? Have you been sitting for over an hour? Get up. Walk around, drink some water, wear your boots when it's raining. For heaven's sakes.

(I can't post a link without complaining a little: I also have issues with that sitting infographic--for example, if all electrical activity in your legs shut off as soon as you sat down, you wouldn't be able to cross your legs or tap your toes while sitting--but its intentions are good.)

SO: read Lifehacker if you want, then get up, walk around, get a massage, and pay your therapist a fair wage, please.

coxal joint; lottery winnings; laundry; Britannia

2011-07-05T09:18:00.001-04:00

Hi again, mom. I'm not neglecting the blog; it's just less complicated than the coxal joint.

There are SO MANY muscles involved in moving your human hips, and for each of them, I need to know its start and endpoints (origin(s) & insertion(s)), direction of muscle fibers, action(s), and friends/enemies (synergists/antagonists). Which is keeping me pretty busy, so good job, school.

I know I'm an adult now because when I dream of winning the lottery, it's only so I can keep paying tuition somewhere forever.

It's time to move my sheets and towels to the dryer, so please excuse me.

(For Independence Day, we made BBQ pulled pork sandwiches and watched Dr Who. Nothing says independence like British TV!)

improved commenting options

2011-06-27T11:40:00.000-04:00

After being alerted to an issue with Blogger's comment system, I've integrated Disqus blog-wide to allow greater commenting freedom and a more relaxed, come-as-you-are spirit to any discussions that get started here. Huzzah.

Allissa is my MT hero; Buddy Holly covers

2011-06-24T11:29:00.001-04:00

I love that the massage community (at least, my circle) is warm and fuzzy and loving. But enough of the hugs and tolerance. I’m pissed. If you’re pissed, too, let’s do something about it. But let’s try to do it with some grace and love. Or not. Whatever.

Like Allissa, I'm planning to be the a$$h*le in the room when it prevents damage being done to my profession. I've already reported cheating I've seen in class, and part of me cannot WAIT to find out there's a sex worker in our midst.

Totally unrelatedly, go listen to this album of Buddy Holly covers.

a few updates: A&P, kale, Amir

2011-06-22T16:08:00.000-04:00

I think I just aced the final for my Anatomy & Physiology I class, so there's that.

This woman loves kale! I love this woman!

Today on the street, I passed Amir of Jake & Amir Dot Com. I was too surprised to say anything. I grinned a little. I don't think he noticed.

but enough boring science! COMICS TIME

2011-06-08T08:05:00.002-04:00

Dinosaur Comics makes a good point about skeletons.

If you're in (any kind of) pain, maybe don't get a massage.

2011-06-08T07:55:00.002-04:00

This study on how the somatosensory effects of pain are nearly identical whether it's physical pain (burning your arm) or intense emotional pain (being dumped) makes me wonder: should recent emotional trauma be a systemic contraindication for massage? Lemme 'splain.

In our first semester, we're given a long list of contraindications--conditions which, if a wannabe client has one, inform us that we should not under any circumstances provide massage to that person, since we could make things worse. (As health professionals, "do no harm" is one of our duties, although "do positive good" is the more fun one.) There are "local" and "systemic" contraindications: if somebody has an open or just-healing cut on their arm, that arm's locally contraindicated for massage and I'd skip it, but I could freely work on the other arm, back, legs, etc. On the other hand/womb, if someone's pregnant, I'm not touching her. She has a systemic contraindication for now, until I'm trained in prenatal massage, at which point her pregnancy becomes a local contraindication for the abdomen. See how that works?

Another of the systemic contraindications, and I think it's one that doesn't evaporate once we're better trained, is "pain of unknown origin." This study, therefore, has me wondering: if emotional and physical pain are exactly the same when the emotion's strong enough, should we maybe not touch the recently-traumatized until their wounds are literally or figuratively healed? Should "recent unexpected breakup or other emotional upheaval" be a checkbox on the massage therapist's intake form along with diabetes, high blood pressure, and cancer? I think maybe.

The study dovetails nicely, too, with the Professional Development class I just took on "Bodywork and Emotions," where we talked about how massage can provoke intense emotions for some clients, even though that's never one of our therapeutic intentions. It's not uncommon for people to start weeping, or giggling, on the table. It's possible some of that weeping is being done by people who'd be better served by modalities other than massage; I realize this paragraph is bad for business, but as an unlicensed n00b, that's fine by me.

Additionally, functional MRI is a technology that confirms for me that we're living in the future.

anatomical features in video games; the first I-promise-I'll-write-more-eventually post

2011-06-07T19:04:00.001-04:00

Another reason I think this is the right track for me: I was watching this game trailer and the last thought I had about it (around 2:38) was not, "What impressive lighting effects and massive environments!" but "Wow, I can see that guy's external occipital protuberance and nuchal lines!"

I've been asked to write more here (hi, Mom!) but I'm in the middle of a three-exam week, so there will be a tiny wait while I study, watch videogame trailers, and sleep a lot in an attempt to avoid the cold going around the apartment. I have a post in mind involving my skepticism re: Eastern medicine, so maybe look forward to that!

nerdy playlist joke

2011-06-01T09:44:00.000-04:00

While I'm supposed to be studying for my Anatomy and Physiology test today, I'm listening to music, and I discovered an inadvertently good song for my growing "massage, as long as clients are OK with English lyrics" playlist: Sufjan Stevens's Saul Bellow, from The Avalanche. It begins:

What's the worth of
All the work of my hands?
And the worst of
On Lake Michigan

which led me to look up Saul Bellow on Wikipedia and then add Henderson, the Rain King to my Goodreads to-read list (GETTING SO MUCH STUDYING DONE, YOU GUYS!) and then I realized that if I were writing an intellectual novel, I'd have a character mention some hip friend of his putting together a playlist that had Sufjan's Saul Bellow and the Beatles' Sun King back to back.

Are you supposed to italicize song titles? Hrm.

Right, back to the books.

I never brag.

2011-05-31T21:21:00.000-04:00

Sometimes, too, I lie.

Our Swedish techniques teacher asked us each to work on her for about 10 minutes today to review what we've learned in our first month of training. After each mini-massage, she sat the therapist down and provided feedback.

To me, after I'd worked on her leg with varying techniques for a few minutes, she said several things in a smiling whisper. She said, "keep doing what you're doing!" and went on to describe my touch as "self-assured, attentive, confident, but" and here I thought she was going to get to the negative/constructive part of her criticism, "with all that, you have a gentle -- I want to say 'lovingness' -- in your hands that's really wonderful." Here, the mental image that is my own face inside my own brain had its mouth agape in shock and glee.

She asked me if I had studied or practiced massage before starting this program (nope, but thank you for wondering!). She said my work is far, far ahead of where it needs to be right now. (She said "far" twice; I counted.)

She said nothing negative. How is that supposed to help me? But also YAY.

So now the introspective part of the post, where I reflect a little on some stuff and try not to be a complete ass about how awesome I am. I've never been as in touch with my own body and health as I've been in the last few years, and I think that makes a difference when I'm trying to insert myself into someone else's health. Which is what practice sessions during class seem to be, in effect. "Hello, we're here together now and I'm going to be rehearsing some techniques on your unfamiliar body. Let me know if I hurt you, and feel free to take a nap," is the usual vibe. But I'm also trying to prepare myself for work with actual clients, where I'll be doing a much more subtle dance, so there are elements of respect and assessment that I'm trying to incorporate even a few weeks after getting started from scratch. I think I want the vibe to be "You've come to me because something is wrong and you need help fixing it. I appreciate that. I'm going to use everything I know, which is a lot, to address that need. Here we go." Something like that. This results, when I do actually know what I'm doing, in a touch with surety, confidence, and attentiveness.

Attentiveness is just listening and responding to obviously important stuff, and I'm reeeeally good at listening. Now I'm learning to do with my hands the same thing I can already do up in my head.

It was the "lovingness" comment that really caught me off guard, and totally made my day. Because here's the thing: ten years ago, if someone had told then-me that now-me is in a massage therapy school in Manhattan getting glowing feedback on the quality of his touch and blogging proudly about said experience? Then-me would have blushed deeply, averted his eyes, and found the quickest possible way to escape talking to this stranger who was clearly having some sort of time-travel delusion. Then-me might also not have been entirely clear on what a "blog" was. Ten years ago, I was firmly wedged in the closet (unintentional fat joke! haha!), ashamed of my body, tangled in a bizarre and unnecessary theology, unsure of how to operate in a world of able people. Today I felt powerful and happy while I practiced what I've learned. Ten years ago, I would have been entirely freaked out by the thought of massage as my profession. Today I'm excited about it, and proudly blogging about a gentleness my teacher felt in me. (Aside to closeted kids: it gets better.)

muscle spasms and forgiveness

2011-05-30T15:48:00.000-04:00

My friend Christine has a great new post at Restless Everything Syndrome linking back and shoulder pain to forgiveness, capping it with this jewel of a sentence:

I reject any forgiveness that has no dirt under its nails, that refuses to sweat, that stands on the sidewalk with pristine shoes and a fake smile, casually avoiding the scarred and glorious faces that wallow in the earth below.

Christine and I have long been on very different paths (for years, with mutual stops in provincial Russia and a Moscow McDonald's) toward providing therapy; she always writes beautifully about her adventures, and you should probably keep an eye on her.

Infinite Jest quote with wider implications

2011-05-29T19:58:00.000-04:00

Be a Student of the Game. Like most clichés of sport, this is profound. You can be shaped, or you can be broken. There is not much in between. Try to learn. Be coachable. Try to learn from everybody, especially those who fail. This is hard. Peers who fizzle or blow up or fall down, run away, disappear from the monthly rankings, drop off the circuit...Opponents. It's all educational. How promising you are as a Student of the Game is a function of what you can pay attention to without running away. Nets and fences can be mirrors. And between the nets and fences, opponents are also mirrors. This is why the whole thing is scary. This is why all opponents are scary and weaker opponents are especially scary.

David Foster Wallace, Infinite Jest, p. 176 of this edition.

Macbeth quote with wide application

2011-05-26T13:12:00.000-04:00

I dare do all that may become a man;
Who dares do more is none.

Act I, Scene VII

coolest anatomical names

2011-05-26T11:47:00.001-04:00

Anatomy has some of the coolest words and phrases in the whole world, you guys. Here's a running list of my favorites.

lambdoidal: rocking the super-rare silent B! This one and the next one refer to suture joints in your skull.
squamosal: I've decided that if I ever have twins, I'm naming them Lambdoidal and Squamosal.
Thenar eminence: sounds like a dignitary on Star Trek, but really it's that lump of muscle at the base of your thumb.

The obligatory what's-in-a-name post!

2011-05-26T11:42:00.001-04:00

Hi, internets! I'm Mike, and I'm trekking through one of the world's great schools of massage therapy. But why am I calling my blog something really hard to pronounce*?

The Greek root therap- relates to healing, as you probably knew, and becoming a therapist happens to be the goal of my personal poiesis. But what's a that? Well, I think it has one of the prettier articles on Wikipedia, and not only is it pretty, but it's got everything: Plato, poetry, sex, Heidegger! So I'll just paste it here in its entirety:

Poïesis is etymologically derived from the ancient Greek term ποιέω, which means "to make". This word, the root of our modern "poetry", was first a verb, an action that transforms and continues the world. Neither technical production nor creation in the romantic sense, poïetic work reconciles thought with matter and time, and man with the world. It is often used as a suffix as in the biology terms hematopoiesis and erythropoiesis, the former being the general formation of blood cells and the latter being the formation of red blood cells specifically.
In the Symposium (a Socratic dialogue written by Plato), Diotima describes how mortals strive for immortality in relation to poieses. In all begetting and bringing forth upon the beautiful there is a kind of making/creating or poiesis. In this genesis there is a movement beyond the temporal cycle of birth and decay. "Such a movement can occur in three kinds of poiesis: (1) Natural poiesis through sexual procreation, (2) poiesis in the city through the attainment of heroic fame and finally, and (3) poiesis in the soul through the cultivation of virtue and knowledge."^[1]
Martin Heidegger refers to it as a 'bringing-forth', using this term in its widest sense. He explained poiesis as the blooming of the blossom, the coming-out of a butterfly from a cocoon, the plummeting of a waterfall when the snow begins to melt. The last two analogies underline Heidegger's example of a threshold occasion: a moment of ecstasis when something moves away from its standing as one thing to become another.

So that's me. Just some dude bringing forth upon the beautiful. Like you do.

* ther-uh-pie-EE-sis